` ZOMG, in the zone ~

Mood: air-head
Eating: fruit of the forest flavoured bar
Listening to: Emilie Simon - "Opium"
=============================

hello darlings ~

Gosh .. I feel a bit iffy tonight, like all over the place .. you know?
Well I've probably eaten too many of those sugary bars that's supposedly good for you .. WeightWatchers .. no, I'm not entirely on a diet but just keep my eye on my food [sort of] and hey, they were on sale and was on my lunch break.
I do need something to eat, y'know.
Anyways .. woke up pretty early today, though I knew that today was one of my days off work .. I just couldn't get back to sleep, and I was all warm and comfy and all that -strange.

Ugh .. I've noticed I really get into movies like Lord of the Rings .. Pan's Labyrinth [which I've yet to watch, lols], The Golden Compass which has yet to come out in the cinemas but the trailer looks real good ;) .. so far that's all I can think of - but those films with complete fantasy worlds and all that really get me into it all - shows just how much, or more likely in my case, how little grip I have on reality.
It kinda worries me that I really do have my head up in the clouds too much .. and quite possibly the reason why I don't concentrate as much as I can .. heh, and also might be the very reason I don't find it strange that Death is a good option sometimes .. not entirely dying but like moving on with a completely different life, even though we'll probably never see heaven or anything .. it's hard to put into words what I'm trying to say.
I think basically what I'm looking for is something that hasn't been available to me, yet .. and if I'm that unlucky, I won't find it here at all .. reminds of this little flash movies I've watched on Newgrounds - good stuff there, if you know where to find them .. so I'll be nice and provide them to you all :)

Across The Universe || coffe break
Corporate Puppet || Crayon Bear
Dark Seat Comfort || Deciduous
Do Us Part || Escapism.
Hanged Man's Elegy || In My Dreams
Lilium || Mums in Heaven
Out of Sync || Pain...
Quand l'amour fut pris || Roof Tiling
Smile! || The Little Girl Who Was Forgotten By Absolutely Everybody (Even The Postman)
I'm Afraid of Butterflies || The Santa Crow's Gift
Obscure || freedom awaits
Dark Reflection

` Music && Soul v.17

Album Cover: Flyleaf - "Flyleaf"
=============================================

Song Lyrics: Flyleaf - "I'm So Sick"

I will break into your thoughts
With what's written on my heart
I will BREAK!

[Chorus 1]
You broke into my thoughts
This invasion makes me feel
Worthless, hopeless, sick ..
I'm so sick

If you want more of this
We can push out, sell out, die out
So you'll shut up
(Shut up)
And stay sleeping
With my screaming
In your itching ear

[Chorus 2]
I'm so sick
Infected with, where I live
Let me live
Without this empty bliss
Selfishness
Let me live

Hear it
I'm screaming it
You're heeding to it now

[Repeat chorus 1 & 2]

I reveal
What you steal
From all of us
We take it back
We take it back

[Repeat chorus 1]

But I heal
With this story
Always working constant purpose
But I heal
I won't compromise
And I heal

=============================================

` Zetsubou Billy by Maximum The Hormone

Possibly, one of the best J-metal/J-rock bands I've ever heard from.
They're just awesome - thank goodness that DeathNote picked up on their talent and featured their songs on the openings and endings for the anime *phew*
And I love how in this PV they had DN in mind ;)
Enjoy, desu ~

=============================================

` Rantings & Fleur de Saison by Emilie Simon

Today starts my 4 days of working this week from Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday.
I'm not too fond of working so many days .. just prefer longer shifts, which these shifts aren't because they only go for 4 hours .. such a waste on fuel.

Looks like it would be best if I transferred to my local Franklins >_>" but I don't like new places .. though TAFE would be something new [if I get in .. I'll have to wait till June to know >_<"!]. BAH! whatever ..

=============================================

` More and more gibberish: so .. UGH!

Mood: sooo random X_x
Eating: was eating choc-mint slices
Listening to: Emilie Simon - "Desert"
=============================

greetings darlings ~

I've been feeling just .. very unenthusiastic lately, and though yeah probably the lack of 'nothing to do at all' might trigger my utmost bordemism and lack of wanting to do anything, or that feeling of motivation - non-whatsoever, these feelings just come and go, just like .. errr .. *thinking* .. like when you flip on a switch.
Yeah .. pretty much like that. As funny [or not as funny, but very true] as it seems, my mood changes just like that .. mood-swing, much? HA! .. tell me about it *rolls eyes*
All I can say is that I've been very addicted to Emilie Simon's songs, still. WTF .. I know .. I'm listening to this french girl that does electronical weird music and other jazzy french stuff o_o the world's coming to an end .. I know it! Lols, kidding ~
Whatever the heck, her music appeals to me during my times of lacking .. it's rather annoying feeling like this 'cause it sometimes, more than likely, leads to me feeling or starting, to feel rather depressed .. because I don't have anything to do, which ultimately leads to a feeling that there isn't much for me to do in the first place, you know? blah ..

Anyways, I think too much gibberish and feeling all emo-like .. ugh, my cousins aren't going to let me go for that one if I say it to their face *rolls eyes again* .. I can only tolerate being called an emo for so long - there IS a difference between being an EMO and being an EMOTIONAL PERSON, because I am, whether I like it or not .. a really sensitive person.
I'm blabbering again!
Okies, whatever .. moving along - thank you to those that read these.

xox Lids

` Desert by Émilie Simon

` Music && Soul v.16

Album Cover: Emilie Simon - "The Flower Book"
=============================================

Song Lyrics: Emilie Simon - "Swimming"

I was swimming across the sky
Clouds and angels by my side
Then I realised that I was lonely
And it wasn't such a good thing

I was flying in paradise
In that ocean of dead lights
I was looking for your smile in the wind
But there was nobody there this morning

I was swimming across the sky
Clouds and angels by my side
Then I realised that I was lonely
And it wasn't such a good thing

I believe in your smile every day
But I know that you're far from my way
When I talk to the moon, I can hear you
In the dark I can see, I can feel your light

I was swimming across the sky
Clouds and angels by my side
Then I realised that I was lonely
And this wasn't such a good thing

I was flying in paradise
In that ocean of dead lights
I was looking for your smile in the wind
But there was nobody there this morning

I believe in your smile every day
But I know that you're far from my way
When I talk to the moon, I can hear you
In the dark I can see, I can feel your light

=============================================

` Iris by Stevie Ryan

` Français Allant - Going French, 'cause it's cool.

Mood: Eh .. ness
Eating: .. nothing, but I want chocolate!
Listening to: Emilie Simon - "Flowers"
==============================

greetings darlings ~

I was just staring at my main blog page, thinking of what to type, so just for the heck of it I'll type away anything.
Yeah, I've been a little unproductive these days .. I gots my time of the month, so yeah .. be nice or else I won't :D
Oh, by the way the song I'm listening to is kinda short but it's so cute and catchy.

Moving along! I've recently been veeeery addicted to Emilie Simon and her songs .. they're awesome stuff! I recommend you check it out if you don't mind all types of music, open to electronic music and some french music - don't worry, they're rather nice and not totally like WTF *thumbs up*, haha.
Ugh .. a little warning before you read on .. referring back to girly stuff .. I needa learn how to use a tampon because I don't know how to stick it in! LOLS!!!!!!!!
Shuddup .. I just don't know how to. Pads are only good for so long .. before they're uncomfy and seriously, I prefer to have something that won't make such a mess >_>" cause yeah .. messy, lols .. save you the imagery for now ;P I'm a nasty, morbid type of person .. lolsness.
I'm out of things to say for now .. so take care and thanks to those that actually read these.

xox Lids

` Music && Soul v.15

Album Cover: Émilie Simon - "The Flower Book"
=============================================

Song Lyrics: Émilie Simon - "Song of the Storm"

Can't you hear my storm coming
Stones falling on to you
Can't you feel the earth shaking
Big dark clouds forming now

Can't you hear my sky shouting
Close, chasing after you
Deep, dark fear building up
It's too strong for you

[Chorus]:
And I hope you're satisfied
I hope you're satisfied
I hope you're satisfied
To see the wind blow over me

Can't you hear my snow crying
Under your feet the ice breaking
Can't you here me, I'm here
I'm whistling in your ear

[Repeat chorus]

Can't you hear my storm coming
Stones falling
Big dark clouds forming now

Can't you hear my storm coming
Stones falling
Big dark clouds

And I hope you're satisfied
Oooh, and I hope you're satisfied
To see the wind blow over me

Over me [x4]

Haaa, can't you hear my storm coming
(Storm coming)
Stones falling
(Stones falling)
Big dark clouds forming
(Big dark clouds forming now)

Can't you hear my storm coming
(Storm coming)
Stones falling
(Stones falling)
Big dark
(Big dark clouds forming now)

=============================================

` Door knocking for money. I mean charity!

Mood: Feeling sick && dizzy 8D
Eating: HAD a BigMac .. yuuuck
Listening to: nothing, I might puke!
===========================

Greetings darlings ~

A little update over here.
Oh, and I finally finished my sketches and got my proper version printed, completed the forms and put it in the mailbox today .. and farout I had to bend it a bit!!!!!!
Whatever .. I just hope I have enough stamps on it and that all my stuff is filled out properly, and that it gets sent in on time, and that I get accepted with my first preference @ Hornsby to do Graphic Design >,< !!!!

In other news though, I'm finally back on MSN .. and still feeling sick >_>" no more Maccas for me .. for a long, long time. Blah!
I feel tired and all .. eh, but I don't want to go to sleep or go shower yet .. sooooo lazy =~=
Well, thanks for viewing!

xox Lids

` Fingers Crossed: Give me motivation to design

Mood: Tired/Lazy
Eating: Heaven Honey Almond Nougat
Listening to: "All The Same" - Sick Puppies
=================================

Greetings my darling readers ~

Yes yes, I haven't been updating much this month. I'm sorry about that.
I've been busying with 'trying to get busy' with the poster designs .. I'm still in no mood to do anything, farout.
I need more motivation, even when my dad said I needed to complete the whole application design thingyo in two days .. that still didn't get me moving much.
I have at least designed out 2 of them so far, but they're extremely rough sketches .. so I need to tidy it up a bit still.
For my third one, I want to go simplistic. Not too much colour, but lots of lines and shapes. For the first two they're rather structured and simple but still elaborate, so yeah .. want to try something really simple stuff.

I bought myself some Doritos and mild-flavoured salsa dip, Thins Thai Sweet Chili chips and a few chocolate blocks.
They were totally on sale, and lucky me I brought along my keycard when I went to work, haha!
Oh, and I had to buy a few bottles of conditioner .. I kinda ran out ^_^; heh .. back to really cheap priced products for me!
Hmmm .. my hair seems to be growing back, that's good.
I'm trying to get my fringe a little longer now, so I'm trying my hardest to NOT cut my hair yet.
I kinda miss my long fringe .. this fringe now, short and all, gets in my eye and seriously, my left eye that always gets covered by my hair is getting worse and I can't see as well from it than my right, which used to be worser than my left.
So yeah, growing it out now and it'll be more manageable that way, I hope.

I had to hang the clothes up to dry today, while I've still got hayfever. Been sick for about a whole week .. I hate being sick .. really makes me tired and lazier than ever, farout. Heh, my mum doesn't like it when I say that .. farout .. bloody, she doesn't like that either.
Oh wells.
The sun's setting .. and I've got about 4 days work: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday .. though I totally forgot what time I'm suppose to be in at on Monday .. pray that my brother Ricardo still remembers. I think it was 3 till something .. I was showering when they rang!!
I should've said I couldn't .. then maybe I could spend more time on my poster designs *rolls eyes* I don't know .. I think 'cause I've been away from learning and all, I'm totally not in the mood to do anything anymore.
I'm getting bored and tired of all of it .. and that's usually a bad thing because then it starts turning into suicidal thoughts.
Yeah .. gotta keep me happy and doing something fun or else I'll go and kill myself 8D!!
Isn't life just grand ..

xox Lids

` Keep 'em fingers crossed! Almost there ..

Mood: Normal [that's a first!]
Eating: [Mush]Mallows
Listening to: "Glitter Girl" - Kidney Thieves
=================================

elloz my darlings ~

My my, it's been a week. I've got most of the TAFE stuff ready at hand, sort of .. I got the letters from the Hornsby area telling me what I need to do, as in, requirements which include that I need to design an A3-sized poster for a pretend animation festival happening this year. Today I went and got the cardboard that I need to mount my actual poster design [which I haven't started yet] and the envelope which I need to put my actual poster design AND another 3 A3-sized rough sketch of my 'poster designs'. So far, alright .. though the envelope I'm a bit iffy, since it's not like normal plain ones .. it's a 'tough' one? Whatever.

OH! When I went out today with my mummy to get the cardboard @ the news agency, I swear the lady working there is harsh. Apparently she's a real b!tch, as my brother had told me later. So, when I went to get my black cardboard and all, went to pay for it the lady was like, That'll be $1.50 and my mum checked [a little rushed] before hand and said it was only $1.05 .. and you know how it is, you want to make sure it is so my mummy was like, are you sure? and Could you check the price? .. and the lady was pretty mean, and said It's $1.50, you either buy it or leave it pretty much .. and in a harsh tone too, obviously not hiding her anger *rolls eyes*.
Anyways, so I was a bit shocked and scared [and I'm not sure why I was, but I was], and so my mum went to check the price again while the lady rudely just, pretty much, snobbed us while she attended to someone else and my mum came back and said it was $1.50 and so I was still standing there ready to pay for real now, the lady turns back to me and I was like yeah, it was $1.50, I'm sorry about that [I'm nice like that ..] and she turns to my mum and fully goes, I told you it was $1.50, I don't like to be argued with then snobs my mum, while my mum was trying to apologise to her [a lot], then she turns back to me, adding sweetly, here's your change and have a nice day thing, and off we went. Seriously, I was still kinda scared off by her .. so I didn't say anything until we got out and far away from the place. Gosh, I can understand that hey, maybe she'd be having a bad day and all but you know, the lady really should've been a lot more nicer than that, honestly.

Moving along, my mum and I just ignored all that and continued our shopping. I bought some Mallows from GoLo and also a few novels @ Big W .. novels which I desperately needed as I was running out of things to read [hoping to get my own little personal library, bahaha!]. My mum bought herself this really nice smelling, honeycomb scented milk wash thingyo. It smells yummy, I felt like eating it, LAWLS. Um .. what else, oh! She also bought some necessities, like FOOD, for one ;P and the other ingredients that make mum's cooking the best, hehe ~
Honestly, I love my mummy's cooking!! It's the best, really. Though .. I suppose it's biased of me to say that, 'cause I'm pretty sure that most children would say that their parents cooking is yum .. but, I HAVE had my cousins and a few of my friends comment how nice my mum's cooking was, sooooooo .. I suppose then that I wasn't entirely biased at all ;P haha!

Well, my dad's gone and cut the bigger-than-A4-but-smaller-than-A3 papers out for me .. I totally forgot what the proper term was when he just explained it to me ^_^; heh .. I need to pay more attention, I know. So now I don't have to stress on making sure the papers are the right size and all.
Now, I only have to worry about coming up with a nicely designed poster where I can use any medium, but it said on the letter at LEAST two different mediums [gah!] .. so, I can't just stick to drawing it seems - dilemma! I doubt I'll get really good quality pictures from the 'digital camera' though I've got >_>" .. it's just those day-to-day use types .. nothing too professional, but I NEED the professional one D:!! So, stuff that for now .. I need 3 rough sketches of my design to do first before I need to worry about the final design .. which I need to get in BEFORE the 25 of May .. so that means I'll need at least the 20th of May .. just in case I hand it in and they send it late! Pray that my designs and application get in on time!!

.. ZOMG, and that's just for Hornsby! I still have to do an aptitude test for the Nepean one first, before the designing .. I think, well that letter should be arriving soon!! Pray again, 'cause I need this in ASAP! I know I've got time, but time is precious so let's not waste any of it!!!!!
Thank goodness the Make-Up Services' course only needs an application .. and, the course is running in Liverpool [3rd preference] and at Ultimo [4th preference, and because Anthony begged me to go there, yes .. begged ;P]. Still, I hope I get into Hornsby and do Graphic Design Diploma for a full time course run .. not too cool with Nepean 'cause it's only part time 'evening' .. yeah .. Make-Up Services at Liverpool is running for full time, so that's good and it's near .. while the Ultimo one is part time day, which is much better than evening.

Oh, and let's not forget I STILL work too!
Gosh, me juggling with lots of things is only leading to one thing - utter chaos. I'm seriously no good with multi-tasking or attending to more than two things at once .. my poor brain can't handle that kind of pressure I'm afraid. My goodness .. I think I typed a lot for this entry ^_^; woops ~
Oh wells, whoever read this far .. and I mean, READ [meaning ALL of it] this far, I congratulate you so far .. bahahaha! I'm not done yet ;P .. Please, I can type a LOT given I had time on my side, hehe.
Okies .. let me try to remember what else I wanted to say .......................... *still thinking* ..................... ugh, oh yeah! .. no, that's not it.
Hmmm .. well, I just need to get into drawing and that wanting to draw .. or else I'm in BIG trouble! Yep, that's about it now ;P
Thank you for reading ~

xox Lids